Aug. 1 we were told that my mom was going to die of lung cancer that metastasized to the brain and radiation did not work.
El Dorado Times - El Dorado, KS
Updated Sep. 26, 2012 @ 3:56 pm
Updated Sep. 26, 2012 @ 3:56 pm
» Social News
Aug. 1 we were told that my mom was going to die of lung cancer that metastasized to the brain and radiation did not work. Doctor said she had weeks left. Doctor referred Harry Hines (sic) Hospice. A hospice nurse who was wonderful started coming in once a week to see our mom.
A social worker came in a couple times to see what she could do. My mom lived at Gordy Square for seven years. I stopped a representative from Gordy Square one day and was going to let her know what was going on with our mom and she ignored me and walked away.
On Saturday, Aug. 1 we wanted to admit our mom into the hospital for comfort care cause we were not sure we would or would not know how to care for her cause we never been through this before with anyone, but hospice talked us out of it and said mom was not in the five day dying phase. On Sept. 5, hospice nurse said said mom would probably would not make it through the night.
On Sept. 6, the hospice nurse came in and said she must be waiting for someone, about 4:30 things changing with mom worried us, my sister called hospice, they said they would send someone out, no one showed up. At 6 p.m. we called hospice again, no one showed, at 7:30 I called hospice and asked them, we were told that hospice would be with us at the last 24 to 48 hours of life and they said yes. I said then why is no one here? She told me she would have them call me, they called and the man on the phone rudely told me I already talked to your sister and was working on getting someone out there.
At 8:45 my mom stopped breathing, I checked her for a pulse and heartbeat, and I was the one to pronounce my mom gone, not hospice. I became a basket case, my sister, my daughter, our aunt, mom, best friend, and I sat in that apartment alone not knowing what to do. My sister called 911.
When EMS arrived they asked us for a DNR, we gave them what hospice gave us and had it on the fridge – a piece of paper said DNR signed by a hospice nurse.
They told us the DNR was illegal because it was not signed by a doctor even though it was what hospice gave us. Since hospice was not there at the time of death, it was an unwitnessed death, therefore it was policy for them to do CPR on her so they put her on the floor, and wanted to send her to the ER for an autopsy.
My sister pleaded with them not to do that and they got an OK from another doctor not to do it, thank God. Police called the funeral home to come retrieve my mom's body and as we grieve for her, to make things worse, the representative from Gordy Square showed up uninvited, which had no business or wasn't even wanted there. While mom gone but still lying in her bed, she served us with papers that we had 14 days to get my mother's belongings out of the apartment. Really this could not wait a day or two?
The Gordy Square representative also ordered my two children and a niece, who all were in their twenties to leave the apartment while they took my mom's body out. Some people should of minded their own business. To top things off, hospice finally shows up. Where was our support?